Why James Bond Would Never Buy A Briefcase From Saddleback Leather

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by Dan (Marketing)

It’s so obvious.  He wouldn’t ever buy a Saddleback briefcase because he would have one in every color and size issued to him by Q.  He would have Saddleback Leather briefcases filled with cash, probably stashed around the world in private vaults.

 

He’d have an Overnight Bag (in Dark Coffee Brown) that inflates into a boat.  And a Front Pocket Backpack (in Chestnut) for romantic picnics but that also had a hidden radio, caviar, explosive chewing gum, a .22 caliber survival rifle (disassembled), a cyanide cigarette, 50 gold sovereigns, a bug detector, a tear gas cartridge disguised as talcum powder, homing beacons, and dental floss (this stuff comes in really handy sometimes).

 

He’d have one stashed in a little Swiss chalet.  One in a beach cottage in the Caribbean with a Walther PPK and a bottle of champagne, you know, just in case.  

 

The strap on his Tobacco Classic Briefcase would double as a satellite antenna receiver to connect his laptop to HQ wirelessly anywhere on the planet.  

 

Check that.  

 

The strap on his briefcase would actually be lined with C4 explosives, which could be detonated remotely by rubbing two pieces of Saddleback Leather together in a rapid fashion.

 

I have to wonder what Q could do with one of the Suitcases?  I bet with one of those puppies Bond could control satellites or hack into former Soviet nuclear bunkers.  

 

For a while we considered adding that as an upgrade feature here at Saddleback but we couldn’t get the fetzer valves to talk to the main control unit.  It’s all ball bearings these days.

 

Did you know the Messenger Bag really isn’t a messenger bag?  I’m just kidding, it’s a messenger bag…………….. Or is it?

 

Maybe Bond would just use a Saddleback bag for it’s sheer simplicity and ruggedness and leave all the gadgetry to Q back at MI6.  At the end of every Bond film he usually walks away from all the gadgets and I can totally see him packing a few nice things in his Saddleback Briefcase and stepping aboard a sailboat to get away for awhile until he gets called for his next mission.

 

What is clear is that if Bond wanted to have the very best gear money could buy to carry all of his gadgetry, he’d pick Saddleback Leather.  Every time.  He’d just put it on his MI6 credit card (which only has a billion pound limit but has a fantastic rewards program).

 

These bags have swum with sharks with freakin’ laser beams on their foreheads, been trampled by angry robot elephants, chewed by crocodiles and speared by Masai warriors (well that one didn’t end so well).
Now, if I could just find my grappling hook suspenders…..

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